Help!

Today, I am going to a benefit for a friend that recently passed away at the age of 36. She was the single mother of 3 teenage boys. When I think of her boys and how I relate to them, I think of the people that helped me overcome the loss of my mom as I was growing up. I pray to God to send similar helpers to Mel, Ty and Pat. 


When I say helpers, I mean people outside of my family that stepped up to serve my family and me. The first are our next door neighbors, the Bowman family. Bette and Rick were a young married couple with a young son, Ricky. Bette sort of watched over me all the time. My sister, Shari, was responsible to get me to school each morning, and most days, I really didn't want to go. There were a couple of times when poor Shari only in Junior High at the time had to literally fight me just to get me out the door. On one occasion, Shari successfully got me all the way to school and as soon as she was out of sight, I walked back home. Bette was there for us, and made sure I was safely returned to school. It became routine for me to go to the Bowman's after school to visit with Bette, help with Ricky and her new babies, Ben and Jill or just play in her yard with other neighborhood kids. Rick was an outdoors man so we always had something interesting to do like shoot a compound bow, ride the mini bike or practice casting our fishing poles in the driveway.  One time, Rick chased after a rabbit, caught it, hit it's head on the bumper of his pick up truck and brought it to Bette to cook for dinner. The Bowman's moved to Northern Wisconsin when I was a teenager. I miss them, but I cherish all my memories of them. 


Another neighbor, Lil Witek, lived directly behind our house. Lil was the elderly grandmother type. I would go visit Lil and play with her Shih Tzu, Snubby or with her grandchildren. Sometimes we would just watch TV or play a card game. Occasionally, Lil would send me on an errand to the corner store and she always gave me extra to go buy some penny candy. She never minded when the ball landed in her yard and we could always cut through her property as a short cut to the next block. Each Christmas, Lil would buy me a present, but she didn't deliver it herself. She sent Santa directly to my house from around the block. Santa would walk up the street and only visit my house just to see me. God Bless Lil and the rest of the Witek family. 


The Gleason's lived a few doors up the street. Donna was their youngest daughter. She was a  couple years older than me, but we were best friends. Donna's sister was cognitively delayed, in those days we called it mentally retarded. Connie rode the short bus and she was my first exposure to a child with special needs. She was so regimented in her day. She would journal which shows were on which days, what she ate, and pretty much everything in her life. She would fill notebooks full of her important information. The way her family cared for her was the perfect example for me to use as an adult in my job. They were patient, compassionate, and protective. Donna and I spent most of our childhood growing up together. Sometimes, we were destructive, but mostly we were just good kids that needed each other. 


Chad..........my younger brother. Maybe not in blood, but definitely in my heart. Chad, three years younger than me, lived down the street with his mom. His dad had died in military service and his mom raised him alone. His mom struggled with obesity and epilepsy. Tragically, she died in the OR during a procedure to "staple her stomach." Chad was sent into foster care and spent most of his remaining childhood with the same family about a mile away. My dad included Chad on some of our camping trips and other family celebrations. 


He and I were sports fanatics. We would always play football, basketball, and baseball regardless of the weather or the time of day. We would make up games so that the two of us could play together when there were no other kids interested in joining us. Step-ball was our favorite. We would make up tournament brackets and have marathon days of throwing a rubber ball against the porch stairs. The other player would have to field the ball for an out. If you misplayed it, a single. If you could get it to bounce over the fielder's head on a fly you would get extra bases. A home run went over the fence into Lil's yard. My dad hated when we played this game, because sometimes the ball would skip up and hit the screen door. The noise inside the house must have been deafening. 


As we got older, Chad and I would get together and party. One time, we were out with my boyfriend, Todd. We drove past a house that was having a party. Just outside in their car port was a untapped keg of beer. We drove around the block, parked and Chad and Todd cut through the yard to get their booty. I stayed behind as the wheel man. I got so nervous waiting for them. It took forever for them to scout and wait for the right moment to grab the beer and run back to the car. Just as I was about to go get them, they came running with the quarter barrel in hand. They got in the car and we took off. Now we had an untapped keg and no tapper. We were able to rent one from the liquor store where Todd worked. How funny to rent a tapper and not buy a keg! We went to my house tapped it and drank what we could. We left it in the garage and the next day my dad was like, hey what's with the beer in the garage? I was like help yourself. He did, but we couldn't drink it all before it went flat. 


Chad is one of the best athletes I have ever met. He could throw and hit with either hand. He played football and baseball in high school and earned a baseball scholarship to a Div 1 school. Unfortunately, he blew his shoulder, but he was able to finish his college degree at Carthage College. He played football for the Redmen. Today he is married with 4 boys, living just outside of Racine with his wife, Cori. A couple years ago, Chad confided in me how much my family helped him when we were growing up. Well bro, you helped us too. We all love you. 


There were others too....my sisters and brother would have a completely different list than me and so would our dad. Of course, our family helped too, but those helpers outside our family were God sent. Who is going to step up for Denise's family?